That also means no funny screenshots with captions. We all love them, but damn they take forever to do and kinda make me put writing these things off in the first place. Use your imaginations! Fantasy, become reality!
As I am only now coming back to this blog after letting it lie around for some months, I'll add some comments in brackets to reflect whether my opinions have changed since then.
Renewal
PC Problems
Floppy Knights
So, the first game I got around to playing was a game from my list at the end of 2022: Floppy Knights! This game came on my radar due to its artstyle, it shares it fully from Dicey Dungeons. This is rather interesting, since it puts the game in the category of having a style that's entirely the same as another game, but still feels very unique since it's a style very uncommon in games still. I think that speaks to Marlowe Dobbe's distinct atstyle!As for the actual gameplay, it's somewhat of a hybrid of many styles. The core gameplay itself is a turn-based tactical game where you summon units, order them to move, order them to attack and use special modifiers. The actual way this is implemented is through a deckbuilder with an energy system, where every turn you draw 5 cards form the deck and get 5 energy to play cards. These cards determine your possible actions, having summon cards, movement cards, attack cards and miscellaneous cards.
So, this in a sense combines games such as Slay the Spire, Card Hunter, Telepath Tactics into one mix. It's important to note that the game's not a roguelike, however! The deckbuilding is more like a Yu-Gi-Oh! RPG, where you start with a basic deck and earn new deck leaders and cards as you progress through the game, augmenting your deck to fit the battle.
The core gameplay is functional, sensible and stable. It rewards clever strategizing both in your deckbuilding and your moment-to-moment decision making. The game's deceptively tricky, sometimes seeming easy until one errant mistake makes you lose the game. It also features very little output RNG, the cards you're dealt are randomly shuffled, but the actual effects of cards are 99% deterministic.
So yeah, the gameplay works, and it's compelling. I enjoyed getting into the game and figuring out what works! There's the main campaign, which has a goofy but fun plot, and there's sidequests and optional puzzles that feature some more brutal battles, puzzle-like battles and battles with gimmicky prebuilt decks and tougher level design.
But then the moment comes when you do figure the game out. When you've assembled the best deck. And then playing more of the game becomes a bit of a chore, because you keep doing the same things over, and over, and over. This happened to me when I unlocked the third deck type, which has by far the best deck leaders and support. At that point it's easy to build the best deck, and just keep using the optimal strategy over and over. And then it becomes somewhat boring, because winning is a foregone conclusion. It's going through the motions, clicking buttons. Maybe add a new powerful card to the deck, but it still plays the same. And that just shouldn't happen in a game like this, but neither the deckbuilding, the moment to moment gameplay or the level designs accommodate to prevent that.
I still enjoyed my time with the game, I just wish it could keep that early rush of excitement.
[Hey, yeah, this actually lines up well with my feelings now. It's a good game, it just doesn't really last all the way into the endgame.]
Crash N.Sane Trilogy
This was not on my end of 2022 list, but these games were on sale, and I did like the Spyro remaster...Well, it's quite different from Spyro! Both are 3D mascot platformers, but while Spyro is an open-ended collectathon, the Crash games are much more closed and linear. My only play experience with the series before this was Crash Bash, though that game's quite different anyhow, being more of a party game. I was somewhat familiar with Crash regardless, though.
But I wasn't ready for how difficult the game actually is! While the games are very generous with handing out extra lives, it's also very easy to lose them. It also has a lives system, yes! I hate those! Really detracts from the game, that.
My experience with the first game in the trilogy was trying. You can really tell it's a remake of a first instalment, much more so than with Spyro. The game is full of annoying sequences, unfair bits and just generally worse game design compared to the second. You can tell the developers looked back after making this and decided some things need fixing.
I think the worst offender is the way bonus gems are earned! Every level has crates, smash them all and you earn a gem. Simple, right? No. In most levels you can't reach the bonus gem unless you have the special coloured gem from some other level. Ok, so that requires some backtracking. But the problem there is that to earn those special coloured gems, you have to beat that level, and break all crates, and not lose a single life. What?! I'm sorry, but... No. I tried, but that sounds genuinely awful. No way.
So instead I just barely got any gems at all, because to get them I need to perfect other levels. And, like, the NO DEATHS thing only counts for the coloured gems! Those are harder to get than the things you unlock by getting them... So instead, now every level ends with the game tallying how much content I missed. Charming.
Thankfully, Crash 2 is immediately much better! The level design is less cramped, more varied and has less annoying and tedious sequences. The coloured gem system got revamped and is much better now. The bosses are generally better, too, though they're still often that style of "avoid the attacks until you can strike" sort of boss that's rather boring, but less than in Crash 1. It's genuinely Crash 1 but better.
So yeah, that's where I am right now, I'm about like 70% done with Crash 2 now. Looking forward to Crash 3.
And now here is Mania, who has finished Crash 2! I really was enjoying the game! And then I wasn't!! I had like a surplus of 40 lives stocked up, but then the final world just consumed them all. The Jetpack levels just felt horrible to control, I didn't like the obstacles in the sidescroller stages and the lights out level was just obnoxious for some reason. And the final boss was pathetically easy, like impossible to die to easy! Weird!
I think I also neglected to mention that death routes and levels with backtracking are awful!
Then I played the third game, Crash Bandicoot: Warped. Only then did everything suddenly click. The game picks off right where the second ends, expanding the scope of the levels from N. Sanity Island to the Time Twister, in which you play historical-themes levels, like a stereotypical WW1 dogfight, Vague Arabia, the Great Wall of China's construction, medieval, future, etc. It's a good gimmick!
The two things that really make this game shine are the improved level design and upgrades. The level design feels much tighter in this game than it did in the second, and especially the first. There's less unfair BS, there's less having to backtrack, the camera in general works better, there's less annoying sequences. I think the reason for this is the addition of Time Trials, which probably forced the devs to speedrun their levels and tweak them to work well for them, meaning the levels just flow much more nicely. They added Time Trials to Crash 1 and Crash 2 in this remake too, but it's obvious the levels are NOT made for them, and it shows.
Secondly, every time you beat a boss you get a new unlock. The first one is just more range on your bodyslam, kinda boring. The second one is an instant staple and creamer in any platformer worth their salt: The double jump! That little bit of extra air time and air control just feels GOOD. Then the third one has the greater spin, which basically lets you extend your basic attack on the ground and in the air, the latter of which also greatly extends your horizontal movement in the air, as the move lets you somewhat hover. The final upgrade is the BAZOOKA. Yes, a BAZOOKA. You read that right. A BAZOOKA. It shoots fruit. You can just whip it out and shoot it at enemies to defeat them, crates to destroy them, or more fruit to collect it. It does pretty much everything. Sound OP? It is! It is gloriously OP. And balanced by the simple fact that using it won't make Time Trials any easier.
[It's funny I wrote this in multiple sequences. I still stand by my appraisal that the third game was the best of the bunch!]
Crash 4: It's About Time
It was interesting to go from playing Crash 3 to playing Crash 4 with a hiatus of only a single day, rather than over a dozen years. This game was clearly made by a different team than the one who did the Remastered Trilogy, and it shows. So, how'd it do?
Well, the third game is still my favourite. But I would say this is my second favourite of the four. The game itself works fine, but there's various frustrating factors and needless bits of padding that really drag it down.
But for starters, what really struck me is how much nicer the controls are, Crash truly feels like he controls the best out of the games I'd played. The weight, the gravity, the distance, they all feel quite right. The game also has a clear indicator of where you are while in the air, rather than the obscure shadow effect of the Trilogy.
The game also looks nice! They went for a different style from the Trilogy, but it still works. It's got a much cartoonier style than the games before it, the characters have personality and charm and good overall animation, it's colourful and vibrant, the locations are diverse and inspired much like Warped's were, traveling through both space and time. I particularly liked the SN@XX Dimension, for example. The game has some areas where it clearly knows what it's doing.
There's more playable characters than before too, with Tanya from Crash 1 joining the fray, alongside no-longer-a-villain daddy Dingodile and still-a-villain Neo Cortex. Of these characters I enjoyed Dingodile the most, his gameplay style felt very accessible and satisfying. Tanya's had too much reliance on predetermined grappling hook points for my liking. And Cortex falls somewhere in the middle, having a more puzzle-style of platforming. He's probably the easiest of them, but I kept messing up the controls for him.
As for Crash and Coco, they keep the moveset from the third game, but lose the OP additional powers. No bazooka, no airspins for extra airtime, but they did thankfully keep the doublejump. A lot of levels have gimmicks that change their controls, some returning from the Trilogy, some acting as temporary mask powers. These are fine overall, they get some mileage out of the character's abilities here. They also do a better job explaining and tutorializing all these moves compared to the older games.
But cracks begin to show. There's the plot for one, or rather, the fact that I'm even talking about it. The prior games just stuck to an intro and outro with occasional moments of a giant head talking at Crash about this and that, but Crash 4 goes for a more cinematic approach, and it doesn't work. There's this running arc with Tawna coming from an AU, and it's really sudden. They barely establish her as a part of the team and then Coco gets SUPER SAD when she leaves the team, like why? They introduce a female N. Tropy which is a really cool idea and then they don't explain it or do much with it and you beat the N. Tropies easily and quickly and it's Neo Cortex. Again. The story just didn't do it for me, and they clearly put more emphasis on it this time than before. A wasted effort.
Another hurdle is the incessant padding. So much padding! Every level has an alternate version of itself that mirrors the level and applies some wacky filter effects but doesn't meaningfully change the gameplay or layout of anything, and many of the levels where you play as a secondary character have you replaying an old stage during the second half. So you could end up playing the same level FOUR times, and that's not including all the collectibles... It's way excessive!
I also found the levels in general overly long and surprisingly more difficult than Crash 3 by a long shot. Everything feels like it goes on too long.
Boss battles were great though, but as an overall package it's just not as consistently good as Crash 3 was.
[Yeah, this is all fair. Good system, but overly ambitious levels and plot.]
Eden's Last Sunrise
Eden's Last Sunrise is the latest in somewhat of a series of unrelated Tactical RPGs I've been playing over the years, followed most recently by Fae Tactics, Fell Seal: Arbiter's Mark and Telepath Tactics: Liberated Edition. Eden's Last Sunrise definitely takes strongly after Final Fantasy Tactics in particular.
The core concept of Eden's Last Sunrise revolves around its setting, the titular Eden, which saw a part of its population, the Spacefarers, migrate to colonize space while the remaining population, the Dwellers, undergo technological regression and become more and more dependant on the planet's Forces, inexplicable magical energies that don't follow the laws of reality. The factions grow more distant as the Spacefarers maintain a non-interventionist policy and the Dwellers start to view the Spacefarers as traitors to Eden's Forces.
Until suddenly, the Spacefarers discover that a cosmic anomaly is going to wipe out all organic life and they have about half a year left to come up with a solution. This causes them to attempt to re-establish contact with Eden with an offer to join the Spacefarers in their plan for survival: Mass digitalization into a new form of electronic life.
As you can imagine, the Dwellers aren't very fond of the idea and some even view the Spacefarers as attempting to instigate a war over Eden's territory. Meanwhile, the Spacefarers are also heavily divided on whether it might not be better to use the Forces as a protective shield instead of the cockamamie digital conciousness idea.
It's an interesting idea for a narrative, and immediately upon starting the game you make an integral choice, do you play as the Dweller ambassadors, or the Spacefarer ambassadors? The choice decides your starting party and the course of the overall plot. The Dwellers learn more about Eden's culture and factions, whereas the Spacefarers start off knowing about the anomaly and their own factions.
A second branch happens after 10 weeks of gameplay, when the faction heads of either the Dwellers or the Spacefarers come to a head (matching the group you picked to start off as) and you can either pick to stick to the digitalization plan, or deviate from the plan entirely. As such, the game has 4 main routes leading to distinct endings, although the two digitalization routes have more commonalities than the extremist routes, which are very divergent.
Regardless of the route taken, the game always follows the same basic structure: The game takes place over 28 weeks of 5 days each, the first day being used up for assigning dispatch missions to your party members, a system also used in the FFT series and Fell Seal, followed by 3 days in which the player is free to engage in battles, training sessions for units and socialization scenes with units. Then the fifth day is a cultural day of stillness in which you get a variety of random events which provide one of several possible bonuses. At set points in the story, once every few weeks, you participate in a major operation, which are where the meat of the story take place. These start off as pretty basic and similar between the four routes, but they diverge more and more, with each route after week 10 having unique major operations.
This is really where the game is the most interesting, and I think also where it falters. While there are four different routes, I do not think it was really worth it for me to lay through all of them. I happened to pick the Spacefarer route first, and then picked to side against the mass digitization idea, therefore going with the protective shield plan. This actually led to a very interesting plot where I basically made everybody else my opponents and my party members kept questioning the morality and ethics of my choices. The route put me at odds with other potential playable characters and even Eden's president and the handler assigned to our project all get to vent about how horrible we're being. It's great. It also has by far the best route-exclusive party members in Kara and Skint, the former of which is absolutely deranged with her social experiments whereas the latter is a big huggable softboi scary red lizardman. Excellent.
The two 'middle routes' which involve the digitization scheme feel less interesting relative to the protective shield route, making you fight against Kara's invasion plan while also facing opposition from Eden's religious fanatics. It's fine, but it feels like a much more standard and pedestrian plot. Kind of the safe and bland middle ground.
The extremist option on the Eden-dweller route should have been the counterpart for Kara's route, but honestly it's awful to play that route after having done the Spacefarer route, knowing that the route-exclusive Zeko is just being an intolerable old git who is wrong about everything. He's just insufferable, and the plot also just completely contorts the character of the spacefarers to have sufficient fuel for conflict. It's weird!
In general the game's plot works much better if you don't pick the Spacefarer side to begin with, as it kind of gives away a midgame twist right off the bat, a twist that makes the Dweller plots just seem largely unimportant or wholly deranged.
There's also the SEEECRET fifth route, which is unlocked by doing at least one full Spacefarer and Dweller run. It's kind of what one might dread a final route could be, a route in which through convoluted means the cast suddenly reach an all too convenient agreement, all decide to overcome their differences and work together, earning themselves an unearned ticket out of this whole mess in a way that just leaves questions. It's the sort of ending that would need a lot of time and build-up, and more payoff, all of which the game just didn't really have. It's a pity, and I'm seemingly not the only person to bring this up, judging by the game's reviews.
Oh, there's gameplay too, right?! Yes. Uh, it's fine. It's definitely most inspired by Final Fantasy Tactics, and much like those games the optimal strategy turns out to be using big-AoE high-damage attackers with the backup of a healer if need be. None of the combat truly feels hard past the game's earliest points, the game has an unusual insistence of making things very fair, in which you're never outnumbered and often outnumber the enemy. This makes repeat runs in particular quite easy. It's never quite rocket tag level of gameplay where everything KOs everything else in one shot, but some classes are definitely just better than others, and a lot of the cool strategy stuff just makes way for doing big damage real quick instead.
Eden's a fine game overall, I definitely like the character writing for the whole cast bar Zeko and Alicia, and the gameplay does work, but it does not stick the landing in terms of plot, and the many battles in the game will inevitably start to feel very samey.
Walthros
Pizza Tower
Resident Evil 4: Remake
The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog
MARDEK: Nineveh Project
Together in Battle
Other media
Unicorn Wars
Unicorn Wars is a war drama story, told through the lens of anthro cuddly bears. Teddybears, polar bears, pandas and of course carebears. All participating in a grudge war against the unicorns in the sacred forest. Can you sense the tonal dichotomy yet? The whiplash between the very dark and serious subject matter and the actual aesthetics of the characters really makes this whole thing just work, and it works so well.
The movie really is all about its characters, especially the protagonist, who is just a horrible little ball of envy and human failings. He's a piece of shit and I love him.
JoJo Part 6: Stone Ocean
The first question is always how the part compares to other parts, and in that regard Part 6 feels almost like somewhat of a mix of 4 and 5. It has a rotating cast like 4, yet the tone feels very serious like in 5. So far I definitely like Part 6, I don't think I could ever not love JoJo, but it does feel less consistent overall. There's more times where I'm scratching my head, whether in confusion or sheer bafflement.
The ensemble feels less cohesive this time around, it starts simple with Jolyne and Ermes, but then Ermes quickly splits off. Emporio joins and brings Anastasia and Weather Forecast, but they only barely appear before the final third of the show, Anastasia in particular only joining when the Isolation Cell arc begins. FF joins as well, and it took me a long time to realize what their deal even was. Anastasia's stand also took me a while to actually grasp what it does...
But then the actual stand battles themselves are very fun and creative, although sometimes they just become hard to follow and have weird rules. It is definitely ambitious, and sometimes it leads to super cool encounters, but other times I'm just lost and kinda just along for the ride.
In particular the isolation cell arc just feels bizarre, the whole set-up of finding a bone feels contrived, and there's three whole stand fights that all don't work for different reasons lined up in a row.
But then so far everything after they finally do get out of that prison feels excellent! And some Stand battles in the prison were great too, like the catch Stand, or the battle with the gravity man. Ermes is also really good, but she barely gets to do much which feels like a shame.
I think the part is well on its way to having a very good ending, so I suspect next blog I'll be much more lyrical about this part!
Andor
Puss in Boots: The Last Wish
And now for something very different! I'd only heard good things about this movie, a movie that people only speak of with lyrical praise... I had to watch it eventually, it's like right up my alley! A beloved Dreamworks movie, a sequel in a grander cultural bastion of movies (Shrek), and everything I'd seen looked as good as people said! What luck that some wonderful people would invite me to their stream to watch it along them!
And yeah! It's exactly as good as people say! It really is just a fucking good movie. It's got a simple plot, but told in a very effective and compelling manner. Every character just works, both the comedic villain, the serious villain and the sympathetic villain. The protagonists are all good. The movie looks fantastic. It's just GOOD. Everything about it is. It's a solid ride of non-stop hits. There really was not a single moment that took me out of it, not even one.
Harley Quinn Valentines Special
The Nature of Sin
Hey wait a second, I made this! It's 75,000 words long! Wow. That's a lot.Writing a wholesale novel's worth of fanfiction for BROK the Investigator wasn't what I had in mind when I finished the game, but I got a flash of inspiration and it spiralled out of control... I'm proud of what I wrote, though! Feedback's been very positive so far, too!
Of course, being a fan fic for a specific game, and an NSFW fic at that, it is somewhat difficult to get people to actually read it, I suppose. But I wrote it with love, and love what I wrote, so I'm satisfied. It feels good to get something done!
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